I ended up last night, after two hours talking to people on the badly-lit [chance's fault] and badly signed [my fault] Friends Historical Society stall at the Groups Fair, exhausted, tearful and feeling altogether inadequate.
I know why I felt like that and perhaps the reason has something to say about how we, as a society, manage large gatherings like this as well as community in general. Several years ago I did a Myers-Briggs course which revealed that I am an extreme introvert and indeed that statistically most Quakers tend towards the introvert rather than the extravert. What this means in practice is not that I don’t get on with other people but that I get my energy from within myself and need time alone. Extraverts on the other hand get their energy from other people and throw themselves into gatherings like these with abandon.
For me two hours enjoyable talking and giving out energy (on top of the physical exhaustion of the morning walking round York which should have told me that I’m still not quite well after last week) pushed me over the edge of my capacity and into the Slough of Despond that is still my default position. (I’m working on that.)
There is such a lot going on this week and such a lot of people to meet and greet that I am sure other introverts will also be feeling the need for space and time out. I know the arrangements committee have this in mind but if we can learn ourselves to understand what we need and to take it as well as to give what we can then perhaps the Quaker community will function better.
I found that very helpful…as an extrovert Quaker I feel in a minority and at the same time I’m conscious I’m not always aware of the needs and feelings of others.
[...] Gil Skidmore reflects on the management of and participation in large gatherings [...]